A short time ago I wrote that I Love You and it attracted some attention. I was sent this image by a friend and thought to use it here. How many times have you done something embarrassing or hurtful without intention to the one you LOVE? Now I’m sure this little fellow didn’t mean it however, things do go wrong sometimes in a relationship and it’s not that easy to get back in the good books of your beloved without having to sacrifice something unless you have a very understanding and committed partnership.

Being in a relationship or partnership brings quite a responsibility if you want it to work. Teamwork is the key. A relationship is a two sided affair so two people need to learn how to communicate with one another in an empowering way.

Relationships Require Commitment

The statistics of marriages breaking down and children growing up with only one biological parent in the home are forever increasing. Now, I am not saying that couples need to stay together for their children’s sake, and if husband and wife are not getting along and have outgrown each other, then it is better for them and their children for the couple to go their separate ways and in my opinion, after sourcing all avenues for help. What I would like to hear about is an increase in responsibilities and making sure that the children are adequately cared for, taught emotional intelligence, and to respect others when this does happen.

I am bringing this subject up because I went to dinner with some of the mothers from my daughters class last week and one of them was finishing off her teaching rounds at a particular school where the majority of children are being raised in a one biological parent home. A great number of these children learn independence at a very young age… as young as nine years old… perhaps even younger in some instances. They get themselves to school and back again as parents have to work to support the family. At my daughters school, most of the kids are dropped off by a parent, usually the mum as they are not at work.

The mother doing the teaching rounds went on to tell us of one child who had slapped a teacher across the face with an open hand and had been expelled from the school and this child hadn’t even turned 10 yet. This was only one incident among many others which she recounted to us that night and I can tell you that the stories weren’t pretty ones. Having said all that, these children will “grow up” faster than children who are lead by the hand in everything they do. Am I being harsh here? I like to teach my children independence and at the same time, respect for others.

It made me wonder and I cannot make any judgments as I do not know the child or her background. I can only surmise that this child is very unhappy and angry to perform such an action. It really made me sad to think that only 10 kilometres down the road their are children crying out for help and there is no-one available to guide and teach them. An I Love You wouldn’t go astray for this child and others like her. It would make a huge impact on her life in a positive way.

Am I making too many assumptions here because at our local school, their are many parents who get involved with their children’s schooling from dropping them off to reading with the children, to volunteering to help out in the classroom for literacy and numeracy lessons and then picking them up again? And don’t get me wrong, my daughters school is not perfect, but it does have a good reputation for being proactive with their curriculum and community. It is family orientated.

Your Thoughts

I would like your opinion please. Do you think it is easy nowadays for couples to separate without giving their relationship the work and commitment it requires to stay alive and strong? Do you spend time nurturing your children and at the same time, also teach them independence? I know there are great variances between children, but as a guide from some of the parents out there who have already been there so to speak… in your valued opinion, what have you tried that has worked with your kids and/or your relationship?

Dedicated to Success

Hello to all ( : Ange left her laptop open so I decided to sneak a post in before she noticed.

My name’s Michaela. I am Ange’s niece, 14 years young. There’s really not much to write, mainly because I don’t really know what my auntie does on here. But I’m going to say this, Ange is the craziest aunt I have. Meaning crazy in a good way. She loves her family and friends and cares deeply about what’s going on around her. For that, I love and admirer her.

I don’t find her on the adventurous scale, and I somehow don’t think The Kakoda Trail was such a good choice of adventure for her, but I know she’ll survive it ( : I think one of the most caring things she has done in the past is ‘FREE HUGS DAY MELBOURNE’.

She has a strong mind and always has her own opinion. If you dislike well trust me, you’re missing out.

I think I’m done on here. Thanks for reading about my auntie Ange ( : Much love to all, especially the one this is about.

xxx

Have you ever felt like you were the only person in the whole universe with a challenge? You may have noticed that I have been absent from Buzzing with Ange a bit lately. To tell you the truth, I lost my creativity and didn’t want to bring you half-baked articles just to keep updating. Instead, I have been meandering along another path away from my laptop and that is the one of further study for my NLP (Neuro-Linguistic-Programming) Master Practitioner along with training for the Kokoda Trek!

Aside from that, we, that is my family, have recently found out that my dad needs to have open heart surgery and as I type this, he has been hospitalised due to a series of recurring minor heart attacks and we are waiting to hear when he will be able to have the procedure done. Needless to say, it has put us all on standby wondering what the outcome will be.

Through all this, I have learned something about myself and that is that I am not the super emotionally strong person I thought I was. Does this mean that I have failed? No, not at all! In fact, what is has done is made me aware of the vulnerabilities that we as humans all have and that is that when someone close to us that we love faces a life threatening challenge, we start asking the questions why. After all, my dad is a very fit man and at the age of 78, he walks 60 kms per week!

The thing is to not ask why, but rather, how do we adapt to make this experience go as smoothly as possible while maintaining a positive outlook so as to keep my dad’s spirits up and help him as best we can through this challenge?


This Is How We Grow

While being empathic to his reality, I think the best thing I can do is spend time with him and ask questions so that I can learn as much as I can about him… I’m sure there are many things that I do not know about my dad and at the same time, tell him how I feel about him. Use the time to really bond and I think I am sounding like this is the end for him, and I’m sure it isn’t, but what an opportunity to get even closer than I was before! My point is that sometimes we leave things unsaid and then have regrets that we shoulda coulda woulda done this that and the other. I have heard it too many times before and I would rather not be left in that situation so speak now before it is too late.

This way of thinking can apply to anyone in our lives who we may be needing to discuss things with. What I mean is to not let emotions hold you back from speaking up about something or clearing the air if need be. I’m thinking in particular about forgiveness and emotional intelligence which goes a long way towards your personal development. Being consciously aware of our reactions to particular people or circumstances and coming to an agreement with ourselves or others, helps us keep things in perspective and not make up stories about it… after all, your reality will differ from the next person’s reality. We all have a different view of life and whatever your beliefs, it is the right one for you. Remember though that holding onto negative thoughts you have without either writing them down or talking about them with someone, will only make you the victim so please, if you have something to say then say it.

I know I am not the first person to be faced with this situation and I won’t be the last. So, I am not looking for sympathy here, rather, I would like to ask what are some of the things you may have tried in a similar situation which worked for you and your family to get you through a time like this?

Isn’t it funny how some people notice all the things that are not working in their lives, while there are others who notice all the good things in their lives and who seem to be aware of all the opportunities that are available to them.

I see and hear this time and time again from my friends and family. That their lives are not working and if only this was this way , and if only that was that way… BLAH, BLAH, BLAH! The thing is that the majority of people fill their lives with too much static which fills the air in the form of newspapers, television, magazines, radio, the Internet, mobile phones, emails - especially those spam chain letters that go around - books, the cinema, music, advertising, politics, other people’s demands on us at work, and all these things jump out at us before we have had a chance to give the most important person in our lives the attention they deserve: Ourselves. We are left with no time to think clearly and no space to do it in.

This is when our perception gets distorted and we are unable to sort through these things which really have no place in our lives and which we cannot do anything about. I call these external forces which have the potential to project the unwanted life some of us have.

Have you ever noticed when sitting on a train during peak hour as people are on their way to work, most of them look like they have a glazed look on their face. I think that these people are living their lives unconsciously, and are on merry-go-round wondering how to get off. They allow themselves to be driven by these external forces.

Imagine if the daily newspapers were a reminder to live consciously every day. I may buy the newspaper if this was the case :)  The media is notorious for distorting the news and telling us what they want us to hear. I remember seeing a short snippet of a news article where the reporter was saying that there had been violent scenes at a protest and the clip that was showing at the time actually had people smiling and happy in the background. I’m sure this happens frequently and I would be willing to bet that what is heard is taken in more than what is seen.  So how do we get off the merry-go-round?

It’s not about changing your life all at once, but rather, it’s about finding a moment of authenticity and self-truth. These moments are the places you can stand on to change the world. Begin with a moment of quiet reflection and something to write on, or if you prefer, you can also do this with your friends.  Start writing. Think back to moments when you felt truly alive, when you were so happy that no matter what you did, everything was a success. Were you five years of age or ten, fifteen, twenty or even thirty or more? Where were you? Who were you with? Was it something that you did once or is it something that is integrated in your life now? Would you love to do it again? What is at play or at work? How did you feel afterward? Once the momentum kicks in, this can be a truly awesome and inspiring experience.

Next, make another list, a list of times when you may have been experiencing fear and doubt and maybe gotten into difficulties. What was it the helped you overcome these experiences? How did you get out of this situation? Was it with help from friends, taking control of your life, learning a new skill, following a spiritual practice, taking a stand, reading a book? I think you get the picture.

If you happen to keep a journal, get that out. Once you have gathered all this information, and it does take some time to do this, you will end up with a very resourceful folio to refer back to. You may be feeling creative after doing this exercise and if so, make it into an attractive compilation and present it to yourself as a reminder that you can live consciously and that there are moments that do work for you in your life. Live up those moments and be aware that you can live the life YOU love. Use this resource every day and remember, Perception is Projection.

It’s funny you know… how many times can you recall saying that you can’t do something because you can’t afford it. I bet those words have sprouted from your mouth 1000 times or more over the years… or have they? Don’t worry, I also have been guilty of this in the past.

Since I started with personal development, my idea of not being able to afford something has changed to how can I afford something. We are all born into our own set of circumstances whether it be the country we live in or the family we are born into. We become conditioned in a certain way of thinking and that is what we believe to be so. So unless we change our thoughts and our idea about money, we may never be able to afford that cruise or that skiing trip or even that new car as an example.

Before I came across some of my teachers like Bob Proctor and Dr John Demartini from The Secret, I never believed that I could achieve any kind of financial freedom. I always believed that I had to go to school, get good grades, find a good job and then live off my retirement money which really doesn’t seem to be able to cover the bills for most retirees these days.So let me enlighten you on the 100 people story. The following facts exist for every 100 people at age 65 in Australia.

• 25 are dead

• 20 have annual incomes under $10,000 (below poverty level)

• 51 have annual incomes between $10,000 and $35,000

• 4 have annual incomes over $35,000

• yet 1 in every 100 is a millionaire

Here’s another interesting fact:

When Social Security was started, there were 16 people working for every one person on the program. Today, that ratio is 3:1 and in the next 12 years, it is projected to be 1:1 (Source: The Millionaire Next Door)

Scary stuff I say! It’s not a pretty picture that is painted here. So if the idea problem is that we don’t have enough money, how are we going to change our way of thinking and turn that around?


Affirmations

I have found that using affirmations is a great way to help re-train the brain if you like and change that prior conditioning that I was brought up with. I love my parents and I am grateful that they gave me life and because they came from a generation that was born before WWII, when there was a real scarcity factor, that is the way they were conditioned and therefore passed it onto me. So, by using affirmations, it has helped me to think differently and scarcity need not be a factor any more. After all, we do live in an abundant universe where we have all that we need. We just need to tap into the abundance.
Some examples of affirmations are:

• I am grateful that I live in an abundant universe

• I now release any and all barriers to my financial and personal success

• I earn, save, spend and invest my money wisely

• My money creates more money

• Every thought I have is transformed into abundance

Simple statements that can be read every day at different intervals throughout your day. You can repeat them whilst showering in the morning to start your day in that state of gratitude and abundance. I even know a couple of people who get on a rebounder and chant their affirmations while they are bouncing! Whatever works for you is great and if you need to adjust the words in the statements a little to make it feel right for you, all the better. Go ahead and create your day to one of abundance. These were examples I thought I would share with you.

Now if you have read this and think that money is not important, I challenge you to walk into a supermarket, fill up your trolley and try to walk out without paying for it. How far do you think you will get? Money is important. Some people would like to have more of it so I am sharing a few things that have helped me change my mindset around it and learn how to make it and how to make it work for me! I am on my way to achieving the financial freedom that I desire and live the life I love to live. How about you?